Karen van Beyer, PhD, LCSW

Mediation can be ordered by the court or the parents can agree to mediate their differences. If court ordered, the parents may agree upon a mediator or if they cannot agree, the mediator is selected by the court. If the parents come to a mediated agreement, the mediator will prepare the agreement, sign it, and date it. A consent judgment is then written up by one of the attorneys and is submitted to the court. The content of what was discussed by the parents is confidential, not admissible in court.

The role of the mediator: The mediator assists in the process of mediation. The parents are in charge of the content or issues that are of concern. The mediator assists in clarifying the issues and then helps develop options so that the parents can come to a consensual decision that meets the needs of the children and takes into consideration the wishes of each parent.

Mediation of child custody  disputes puts he parents in charge of developing a plan that will meet the emotional, educational, and financial needs of their children following divorce. Rather than looking at past difficulties, mediation focuses on what each parent wants at present and in the future. It assists the parents in learning positive ways of resolving disputes that might arise by teaching communication skills and conflict resolution techniques. It is a goal-directed, problem solving approach. 

If parents are willing to do their best to negotiate their differences, they should be given every opportunity to do so. Dr. van Beyer offers this service on a sliding scale as a way to encourage this form of dispute resolution. If you are interested in trying to mediate, contact Dr. van Beyer to start the mediation process.